Teresa's Smashing Night in the Kitchen, Part One of 52

I am an untalented cook.

On Christmas night, I watched Julie & Julia (Sony Pictures, 2009).

I felt inspired. I also felt a degree of shame for not trying harder to take my kitchen and show it who's boss. In the movie, actress Amy Adams, playing real life blogger Julie Powell, tries four times to get a chicken dish right. She burns a beef dish and makes it again the very next morning. In contrast, I flee the kitchen for weeks when the smoke hits the detector.

So when Mike Levy asked me to contribute to Take 52, my first thought was: If Julie Powell could commit to following a Julia Child recipe everyday, I certainly could try one new recipe a week.

Like Julie, I adore Julia Child and French cuisine, but I have 18 extra pounds of fat dancing around my waistline. Although I've read and loved Mireille Guiliano's book French Women Don't Get Fat, I certainly do.

And I know why. I don't diversify my meals. I have had great success with some diets, especially healthy-carb programs. But eventually I get bored with the food, and I start hunting for sugar snacks, pastries and pasta.

This year will be different. I am going to try a new, great, family-friendly, healthy meal at least once a week.

The fat will be evicted. I photographed my belly rolls this afternoon, hoping to post them and then laugh with delight months from now when my tummy is so much flatter and my jeans so much looser. I also photographed all phases of the meal I made tonight, my first attempt at a low-carb stuffed meatloaf, starring beef, mozzarella, Parmesan, red peppers, ham, onions, garlic, spices, and herbs.

But I can post no pictures right now. As the meatloaf was cooling on the stove, my toddler son, standing on a chair (a no-no) at the kitchen table, hoping to reach my open laptop (another no-no), lost his balance and crashed to the floor. The laptop followed. He is well, thank God. The machine is dead.

Minutes later, my four-year-old asked to help photograph my settled meatloaf. While within inches of the kitchen table, I smashed my 9" x 5" mozzarella-oozing meat loaf onto my very unwashed floor.

Coincidence? I think not. Evidently the Bermuda Triangle just moved into my kitchen.

As soon as I can, I will post pics of my love handles and my slippery loaf of love.

Ciao.